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13 Jan 2019
239,172 notes
13 Jan 2019
20,004 notes

jupiters:

me at 9 pm: got a big day tomorrow. better hit the hay 

me at 2 am: 

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(Source: revolutions, via best-of-tumblr)

13 Jan 2019
277,767 notes

I was looking at Craigslist and…

bearmagus:

entropytea:

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what the…

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A jouch?

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Or, if you prefer - a jofa?

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Oh good there’s matching chairs. 

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Jairs.

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What the-

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WHY?!

Cinematic Parallels

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(via illegalaustralien)

11 Jan 2019
38,418 notes

adult-sasuke:

that post was right i wouldn’t have a sense of humor without spongebob. its still some of the goddamn funniest shit i’ve ever seen. spongebob almost dying because he’s too polite to ask for a glass of water at sandy’s house. mr. krabs and spongebob killing the health inspector. smittywerbenjagermenjensen. “I was born with glass bones and paper skin. every morning I break my legs. and every afternoon I break my arms.” the perfume department on the flying dutchman’s boat. that time spongebob cleared his mind to be a fine dining waiter and forgot his own name because that’s how customer service just BE. the ugly barnacle that was so ugly everyone DIED. the END. the one where squidward buys a pie but it’s actually a bomb. and the MUSICAL numbers like??? the fun song. the christmas song. tony award winning song “this grill is not a grill”. the entire band geeks episode like…this is all from the top of my head!!!!! just from the top of my head!!! there’s so much more!!! thank god for stephen and all the laughs i’ve had because of him.

(via confirmance)

11 Jan 2019
123,644 notes

dyselxia:

when you flawlessly execute an insult

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(via funny-jack)

10 Jan 2019
527,384 notes
beyoncescock:
“my lifes a lie why did I just know about this!??!?! everyone probably thought I’m so silly wearing a plastic behind my ear
”
10 Jan 2019
25,915 notes

turing-tested:

full offense but i hope a certain someone does well in life and finds joy and love that they deserve

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(via funny-jack)

10 Jan 2019
39,464 notes
officialstarscream:
“ sneauxflake:
“ sneauxflake:
“getting ready to joust at hole depot :)
”
home depot* jesus christ
”
THE HOLE DEPOT
”
10 Jan 2019
233,961 notes

meanplastic:

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Gave him what???

(Source: meanplastic, via funny-jack)

10 Jan 2019
19,543 notes

heteroh:

when people ask you personal questions

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(via thebootydiaries)

09 Jan 2019
299,097 notes
09 Jan 2019
301,337 notes
09 Jan 2019
22,260 notes
09 Jan 2019
23,517 notes

ironpour:

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09 Jan 2019
35,682 notes
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